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by: pinkguitarchick2 (05/22/2007)

I've got big balls! Oh I've got big balls! They're such big balls! Dirty Big Balls! He's got big balls, she's got big balls! BUT WE'VE GOT THE BIGGEST BALLS OF THEM ALL!!!!

-AC/DC "Big Balls"

Naughty
1,127 Clicks

by: zeppelin027 (05/22/2007)

One day a teacher had a taste test with her students. She picked a little boy to do the first test. She blindfolded him, put a Hershey kiss in his mouth and asked, "Do you know what it is?" "No, I don't," said the little boy. "OK, I'll give you a clue. It's the thing your daddy wants from your Mom before he goes to work." Suddenly, a little girl at the back of the room yelled, "Spit it out! It's a piece of ass!"

Naughty
1,144 Clicks

by: chelzy609 (05/07/2007)

:::60 Things not to say to a Naked Guy:::

1. I've smoked fatter joints than that.
2. Ahh, it's cute.
3. Who circumcised you?
4. Why don't we just cuddle?
5. You know they have surgery to fix that.
6. It's more fun to look at.
7. Make it dance.
8. You know, there's a tower in Italy like that.
9. Can I paint a smiley face on that?
10. It looks like a night crawler.
11. Wow, and your feet are so big.
12. My last boyfriend was 4'' bigger.
13. It's ok, we'll work around it.
14. Is this a mild or a spicy Slim Jim?
15. Eww, there's an inch worm on your thigh.
16. Will it squeak if I squeeze it?
17. Oh no, a flash headache.
18. (giggle and point)
19. Can I be honest with you?
20. My 8-year-old brother has one like that.
21. Let me go get my tweezers.
22. How sweet, you brought incense.
23. This explains your car.
24. You must be a growing boy.
25. Maybe if we water it, it'll grow.
26. Thanks, I needed a toothpick.
27. Are you one of those pygmies?
28. Have you ever thought of working in a sideshow?
29. Ever heard of clearasil?
30. All right, a treasure hunt!
31. I didn't know they came that small.
32. Why is God punishing you?
33. At least this won't take long.
34. I never saw one like that before.
35. What do you call this?
36. But it still works, right?
37. Damn, I hate baby-sitting.
38. It looks so unused.
39. Do you take steroids?
40. I hear excessive masturbation shrinks it.
41. Maybe it looks better in natural light.
42. Why don't we skip right to the cigarettes?
43. Oh, I didn't know you were in an accident.
44. Did you date Lorena Bobbitt?
45. Aww, it's hiding.
46. Are you cold?
47. If you get me real drunk first.
48. Is that an optical illusion?
49. What is that?
50. I'll go get the ketchup for your french fry.
51. Were you neutered?
52. It's a good thing you have so many other talents.
53. Does it come with an air pump?
54. So this is why you're supposed to judge people on personality.
55. Where are the puppet strings?
56. Your big gun is more like a BB gun.
57. Look, it fits my Barbie clothes.
58. Never mind, why bother.
59. Is that a second belly button?
60. Where's the rest of it?

Naughty
1,165 Clicks

by: azngamer64 (05/07/2007)

An essay is like a girl's skirt, it has to be long enough to cover the essentials, but short enough to make it interesting.

Naughty
1,129 Clicks

by: zeppelin027 (04/10/2007)

A woman was walking down the street when she was approached by a man. The man said, "I must have you right now! I'll drop $500 on the ground at your feet and in the time it takes for you to pick it up I can have my way with you from behind!" The woman thought it over and told the man to wait a minute. She called her girlfriend on her cell phone and told her about the man's proposition. Her girlfriend said "When he drops the $500 on the ground I'm sure you can pick it up and run before he gets his pants down. Call me back and tell me what happened." An hour and a half later the lady called her girlfriend back. "What happened?" the girlfriend asked. The lady said "That jerk had $500 in quarters!"

Naughty
1,141 Clicks

by: BigD (04/09/2007)

For the first 9 months of a man's life he's trying to get out of it, but for the rest of his life hes trying to get back in.

Can you figure out what it is???

Naughty
1,125 Clicks

by: idunno? (03/03/2007)

When I die, bury me upside down so that the world can kiss my ass

Naughty
1,125 Clicks

by: Wentz21 (01/16/2007)

Whoa %n, keep those pants on! I'll be back before you can say "DO ME!"

Naughty
1,130 Clicks

by: Jake Himself (01/16/2007)

On top of a pickle relish jar: I relish the thought of meeting your buns.

Naughty
1,125 Clicks

by: sickofbeingtired (01/16/2007)

Note to self: go to pen island . com

Naughty
1,125 Clicks

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